mexico turn

Some of our trips look really good on paper.... until we fly them. Considering the fact that I am drowning in debt, I have been trying to pick up flying lately, for extra money. The funny bit is though, that flying too much makes me mentally ill, and causes me to do things like run to a bar and spend $100, or run to the Nordstroms shoe department to console myself in new shoes. So I really should probably just fly minimums, conserve my mental health, thereby getting out of debt an easier way. But I am still learning....

My little Mexico turn was actually not bad.. pretty good crew, and we got out and back on time, without delays. The "crowd" was a little challenging though... the type that flies once every Hailey's comet, and ask when the hot meal is coming, as I sashay down the aisle selling the snack boxes we have been selling for the past 5 years. These poor people,,, so excited to be going to some trashy resort...

The most shocking bit though were the questions asked after we handed out the customs forms. I kept running back to the galley to report the "best" ones so far... but they continued to create fierce competition for one another, asking increasingly stupid questions. I thought I had found a winner when a girl about 20 years old asked me what to put down next to Nationality. I looked at her for a second, blinked, and I said put down your nationality... your citizenship. She then said "you mean like North America"? and I responded, Are you Mexican, Canadian, and American? then it was her turn to blink, and say "no, just American". And then I in a pleasant flight attendant style way said "well I suggest you write that then!!" Then I booted it back to the galley proclaiming I had won, I had received the dumbest question of the day. The other F/A said "how sad. and these are our fellow Americans.....and they don't even know it!!!

I totally had it in the bag, so I thought, until I walked by our purser in the aisle who was leaning over a lady with a silk screen unicorn on her t-shirt. I overheard her asking him which box to tick for mode of transport into Mexico, Land, Air, or Marine. She didn't even seem to know she was in the air!

I was slightly envious of my dumb question only getting the silver medal...

Oh well, maybe next time. It is a fun contest to play....

I am off now, for a few days, and fly again on Tuesday, on reserve (scary).

Post wedding travels

After one of our closest and dearest fell to the side of smug marrieds, us singletons decided to do a bit of road travel... we (the bridesmaids) went off with Capt. Chris, and had a great day in Florence... saw David, got yelled at for taking photos, and had another great dinner... Florence was beautiful, I really loved it. Getting back was a bit of a fiasco as there was a last minute random train strike, but we managed to find our way... The next few days took us to Lucca, San Chimiagno, where we had lunch and enough booze to inspire me to spent about 2 weeks wages on porcelin tableware and olive oil dispensers (which would be fine if I even owned a table... but I am sure one day I will!!!)

Had a very lovely time the last few days, spending the last night in Pisa, before I was on my way. I was very freaked out about getting home during the world cup madness, but somehow got on Lufthansa to FRA, (I have always had great luck pass traveling on LH, they really treat us well too), and the LAST seat on my flight home from Frankfurt, but it was thankfully an aisle seat, and I just knocked myself out with small pills chased by wine. It was nice to get home, but I did suffer several days of that anti-climactic day after Christmas type feeling.... Still, had a wonderful time... wanted to blog it to help remember it. I promise now my blogs will return to horrific inflight incidents and experiences... stay tuned......

Wedding Day

The morning of the big day started off right,,, miraculously no signs of a hangover despite the rum and cokes, and a delicious breakfast with chamagne while getting hair done.. (who says always a bridesmaid is a bad thing anyway!?)

Estelle was calm and sweet as usual, no bridezilla behavior whatsoever... her only request was that the champagne was to be extra cold and steadily flowing.... a request I was happy to fulfill. We put on our lovely bridesmaids dresses, which really are beautiful, and dressed the bride. I was unfortunatley talked into buying a strapless bra/ contraption from the tailor who altered my dress, not considering at the time that it would be about 34 degrees c in tuscany.... so I had this contraption, which caused a hip buldge, forcing me to wear spanx, to suck in that buldge.... so I had a bit of a situation from the get- go... anyway, I did my best to stay cool and calm, and focus on important duties....

we headed down to the chapel which was on the villa grounds, and very old and beautiful and smallish. Estelle looked amazing. We all did a pretty good job at keeping the tears to small, quiet graceful ones, and there was only one moment of lack of composure when I heard the priest say "God unites these two in sexual union". I thought it maybe an auditory hallucination caused by the tight bra and spanx, and pre-ceremony champagne, until I saw Sarah's flowers quivering and Jane's eyes go wide.... I had never heard a priest say sex before. Luckily I did not laugh, and made it through... we then threw confetti at the Bride and groom and had our photos taken.

The photographers are 2 virgin atlantic girls who fly part time and do photography part time... they are an absolute scream, and dress in matching outfits... they are actually hard to tell apart, except for the fact that one was newly pregnant, so had a little bump... they clearly love their jobs, and almost do it without financial gain, as they spend their profits on their matching outfits.... Hopefully they will be featured on www.milehighpoxic.com soon, in mind your own business, as they really are good, for anyone LHR based, who needs a photographer and/ or fun wedding guests...


After photos and cocktails/ canapes, we went to the reception hall, (which of course was beautiful) and had a scrumptious meal.... several courses later, (risotto, crepes,soufle) coupled with the champagne, and I was in a bit of a state, ready to bust out of my contraption. I had hardly enough room to scull down the few last chance of liquid courage drinks before the speech.... the moment I feared most and was least prepared for came and went quite quickly. I was in a bit of a heat stroke/ drunk/ over-fed state, luckily my audience was too, so it seemed to go over really well. It was a bit of an out of body experience, but I think I hit the right mix of sweet and raunchy... a delicate balance that must be achieved for wedding speech sucess. The main story in the speech was one that estelle had requested I not tell, so naturally I had no choice but to tell it. It was the story of her and I at age 14, trying our hand at "romantic fiction writing" (inspired by the one or 2 Harlequin romances we had gotten our mitts on). We were actually late bloomers in the romance department, so were not exactly sure of all the Harlequin references, but we instinctivley knew they were naughty and fun.... so we wrote our own little forbidden novel, got distracted, and shoved it absent-mindedly in a nearby srabble box. The rather innocent writing activity turned tragic when her father found the script, in the scrabble box, on a Christmas holiday in Lapland, in a scene that could not have been more innapropriate for our Harlequin. In an attempt to decipher what exactly it was he began to read it, out loud, in front of estelle's family....

words like 'writhing, busom, manhood, and thrust'. It took about 10 years for estelle to partake in a game of scrabble without cold sweats.... so I just had to incorporate it in the speech.... she forgave me...

After the reception dinner we spilled down to the outdoor terrace where we danced all night in a lemoncello fueled delerium. It was great. One of the bridesmaids (no names) go a little bit over the top. There were tears and unsolicited hugs, lectures, speeches, and then stripping and yelling at things. All was forgiven, as weddings bring these things out in the wedding party, as we all know...

We woke up in various states of undress and make-up, and the hangover free miracle of Tuscany continued!!!! Everybody made it to the recovery brunch!! (some a wee bit worse for wear, and in sunglasses, but still!!!) we sent the happy couple off on their honeymoon to Rome and the Amalfi coast, and then headed off on our own travels!